An anthem for the birthers

      1 Comment on An anthem for the birthers

Jon Stewart eviscerates the suddenly-prominent birther movement:

Has Colbert done a segment on these clowns yet? It seems right up his alley.

Meanwhile, as I was writing this post’s title, and contemplating whether “birthers” should be capitalized or not, I was reminded of the term “Birchers” — as in, the John Birch Society — which, of course, reminded me of the Chad Mitchell Trio song of the same name:

That got me thinking that an update might be in order:

Oh we’re meeting at the courthouse at eight o’clock tonight
You just come in the door and take the first turn to the right
But if you’d like to join us, you must first quell our doubt
Bring your long-form birth certificate or else we’ll kick you out

‘Cause we’re the Prove Birth Society, the Prove Birth Society
Here to save our country from a Kenyan Muslim plot!
We’re the Prove Birth Society, and we’ll expose The One
If he can’t prove a negative, he’s not a native son

That short-form Live Birth record is really just a crutch
We think that Linda Lingle doth protest a bit too much
Barack Hussein Obama’s not even his real name
They called him Barry Soetoro before he rose to fame

Oh we’re the Prove Birth Society, the Prove Birth Society
Xenophobia is the phobia loveliest of all
Join the Prove Birth Society, help us save the day
Have you heard they’re reading the Koran down at the DOJ?

Well you’ve heard about the lawsuits that we’ve already filed
They’re filled with phony evidence we’ve carefully compiled
The courts refuse to hear them, but that just proves we’re right
Our judiciary’s fallen to the Kenyan Muslim blight!

Yes, we’re the Prove Birth Society, the Prove Birth Society
Barry what’s-his-name may think he’s kidding us along
But the Prove Birth Society knows he spilled the beans
In Cairo he preached brotherhood, but we know what he means

We’ll teach you how to tell a real native from a fraud
‘Cause you just never know which liberal fools were born abroad
We know Jen Granholm’s foreign, we think Chris Dodd might be
And the day we get Pelosi, won’t that be a victory

Oh we’re the Prove Birth Society, the Prove Birth Society
Here to save our country from a Kenyan Muslim plot!
In the Prove Birth Society, just one small hitch remains
If we disqualify Barack, then Biden takes the reigns

(O beautiful, for spacious skies, for amber waves of grain)
Do you want Osama Bin Laden to be your Secretary of State?
(For purple mountain majesties, above the fruited plain)
Do you want Hugo Chavez to be America’s best mate?
(America, America…)
You cannot trust Obama, he’ll stab us in the back
He’s a traitor to our country — and, oh by the way, he’s black

Oh we’re the Prove Birth Society, the Prove Birth Society
Don’t bother us with “facts” — we know we’re right, and that is that
We’re the Prove Birth Society, and we’re on the move
Spouting unsupported nonsense that Obama can’t disprove
He can’t disprove!
We’re the Prove Birth Society!

1 thought on “An anthem for the birthers

  1. Joe Loy

    Waw haw haw / veryverygood :}

    (Tom Loy Memorial Kibbitzing Dept.: it occurs to me that “the UnBirth Society” would have sounded marginally closer to the original than “Prove Birth…” — but probably sneaking in that “n” sound wouldn’t have been worth the increased Remoteness of the Meaning.)

    “…contemplating whether ‘birthers’ should be capitalized or not, I was reminded of the term ‘Birchers’…” When I (recently) first heard the term “birthers” applied to the He’s-a-damn-Furriner crowd, I assumed it was a deliberate play on the Birchers rather than just a felicitous coincidence. Maybe I assume too much historical memory on the part of our cultural Moniker-makers :>.

    But speaking of Too Much historical memory, NOW look what you’ve gone & done, you’ve got me all Misty-eyed & Nostalgic, here (sniff sniff :)… Impeach Earl Warren… Unleash Chiang Kai-shek… Ban Fluoridation (poisoning our precious bodily fluids)… Save our traditional Wooden Toilet Seats — no wait, wrong group, that was the Birch John Society… ah yes, those were The Days, my friend… ;>

Comments are closed.