Category Archives: Utter Miscellany

Obama convenes poultry death panel, spares turkey

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In addition to the funny tweets posted below, here’s another take on today’s official turkey pardoning, from Doug Mataconis: “That must be the biggest Turkey to get a Presidential Pardon since Ford pardoned Nixon.” Heh. Personally, I want to know whether that turkey was even born in this country. I bet he’s a foreigner, and thus constitutionally ineligible to be… Read more »

Protestant sheep painted by papists!

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Bwahahaha: Six pregnant sheep belonging to a Protestant farmer from County Tyrone have been daubed with Irish tricolours in an apparent sectarian attack. The sheep had been left to graze in an isolated field near Ardboe when their coats were covered in green and orange paint to resemble a tricolour. According to the farmer, who does not want to be… Read more »

“You’re not news!”

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Heh: (As Seth Meyers points out on Twitter, this aired the day before BalloonBoyGate was officially declared a “hoax” by the authorities.)

Chip Caray, idiot

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Heh: In case you missed it, TBS baseball announcer Chip Caray made, er, a slight mistake in calling a potentially game-deciding play during the 10th inning of last night’s one-game playoff between the Twins and Tigers for the AL Central title: Caray was presumably confused because, normally, a ball on that sort of trajectory to shallow left field would indeed… Read more »

Worst. Analogy. Ever.

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Vail resident Sally Rebehn, master of the apt analogy, describes her experience discovering a bear in her bedroom: “I turned around and it was so odd, your brain takes a while to register. No way I thought there would be bear in the bedroom. It’s kind of like when you think you’re about to drink a glass of water and… Read more »